I’m going to start something new. Once a week I’ll post a pic that I find interesting. The person that comes up with the best caption wins. What do you win? Well the bragging rights of course!
So without further ado…….
Caption This!
Ok, Ready, Set, GO!!!!!
As I mentioned in a previous blog I’m officially diabetic. My A1C was 7 so the doc put me on Metformin 500MG. I’ve had nothing but trouble with it since I’ve started on it. It’s making my IBS which is already bad even worse. I had 7 bouts of rear end issues in a 4 hour time span. I know, I know TMI. I’ve already told my doc this was making the IBS worse but he wanted me to stick it out and assured me it would get better.
That’s what I’ve been doing. Now my blood sugar which has never in my life been this high is running in the 200’s. What?!!!!! This stuff is NOT working for me. I’m going to try it one more time and if it doesn’t help Friday then I’m going off of it for the weekend and the doc is getting a phone call Monday morning. I had half of a cheeseburger. HALF! Nothing else and my blood sugar was 199 after two hours.
As I mentioned in the blog right before this one the “Fuck It” list. Number one on that list is going to be Metformin.
Fuck It List
1) Metformin 
A friend of mine is going through a rough time in her life. People she’s counted on to be there for her in her time of need haven’t been. I completely know how she feels on that one.
Anyway…..she was talking to someone and they said instead of making a “bucket list” to make a “fuck it” list! I like that idea! Certainly be a way to rid myself of stress. 
Today hasn’t been to bad of a day if I say so myself. Nothing earth shattering happened but it’s the small things that really do it.
Today for the first time since the stroke I had several hours of pure clarity. No struggling for words, no not knowing what something was. It felt AMAZING! It’s funny how much we take things for granted. Simple things that we do every single day such as reading a text, having a conversation without struggling for words. I will never take those things for granted again.
Another milestone was that for the first time since the stroke my heart rate was in the “normal” range. I’ve been running anywhere from 111-120 at rest. I actually got down to 94 beats per minute. Woohooo!!! How amazing is that?
I saw the doc on Monday for my physical and check up from the stroke. He put me on a Beta blocker and it finally kicked in today. 
On the down side I’m still beyond exhausted and I still can’t handle any type of heat. My poor family are living popsicles because I keep the A/C at a chilly 66. To me that’s perfect and I’m in shorts and a t-shirt. To them, they are under blankets. I’m hoping that this too shall pass.
On the potty training front Sarah has had no accidents at all today. I parked the potty chair in front of the tv and that’s been working. She even actually chose to use the toilet this evening instead of the potty! Like I said it’s the little things. I’ll take it.
Remember this is my back up blog. I keep my main blog on my own domain. Check it out at www.prettyinpinkpixels.com/blog
I’ve had a so many blogs floating around in my head but have been unable to put my thoughts into actual words.
I miss blogging, it’s always soothed my soul. I don’t do it for anyone other then myself. If other’s read it then great if not that’s good too.
Since the stroke I’ve been going through so much. My personality is changing. I seem to have no social filter. I’m exhausted all the time. I can’t tolerate any sort of heat. I’m just plain miserable.
I’m still having some confusion issues and I have to search for words when I’m in a conversation because I can’t remember what things are called or what the word for what I’m saying is.
Case in point, I had gotten a message to my cell phone from twitter. I couldn’t read the word “twitter” I could see it but what it was just was not clicking. I had to ask someone what it said. 
Today I was trying to talk about my ankle and I couldn’t remember what it was called.
When that happens I get angry at myself and I just want to cry.
Today I saw the doctor. My white count is still up. They can’t find a cause for it. I am now a diabetic which I’m not handling well. I’m pissed off about it. I’m just barley one but I’m still one. I have to test my blood once a day and take meds for it twice a day.
The meds make me sick, I get severe diarrhea from them and nausea. I already have IBS with diarrhea and this is making it worse. Way worse.
Tomorrow morning I have to start a beta blocker to see if we can get my heart beating as it should. I’ve passed all the heart tests so they are assuming the thyroid meds I’m on are causing it. Since I have no thyroid I can’t go off of them. Pharmacist said this pill will make me sleepy. As if I’m not already tired enough.
The kids and I haven’t done anything this summer because I can’t handle the heat at the moment and being insanely tired. I can’t even walk around Walmart. Not that I really want to, but still.
I’m still waiting for the results of my EEG. I had the test last Weds but still no results. Grrr…..
Tomorrow or actually later today since it’s 2:22am I have to get my yearly mammogram. I had told Liz I didn’t need her to drive since it’s in town but until I’m used to the beta blocker they don’t want me driving. I’m not supposed to be driving at the moment at all anyway because of the confusion. Whatever…….
I’ll try and be a bit more positive in my next blog just having a woe as me sorta night.
Remember this is just my back up blog. My actual blog is hosted on my domain. www.prettyinpinkpixels.com/blog
For those of you that know me, you know that I’ve recently had a TIA. What is a TIA you ask? It’s a Transient Ischemic Attack. Still lost? LOL, don’t worry I was too. In layman’s terms it’s a mini stroke.
On June 28th I decided at 10pm that I needed to go to Walmart and get a few things. By nature I’m nocturnal but normally I would have waited for my daughter to get home from work and go then, or would have asked her to stop off at Walmart for me on her way home.
For some reason I did neither of those things. While I’m known for my spontaneity it’s not in my character to drag my kids out that late at night. While it is summer and they were all up…which that in it’s self is odd. Usually one or two are asleep by then…….anyway…..I told the kids to get ready to go. I knew Liz was getting off of work soon so I called her and told her we were going to Walmart, and asked if she would like for us to wait for her. Normally she would have said no she was tired. This time she said sure.
So it’s 10:30 at night by this time. We are all in the van waiting for her. She pulls in and hops into the passenger seat. Something else that is odd. I always have her drive at night because I’m night blind. But not this time.
We get to Walmart and were looking around. All of a sudden I got super hot and super grumpy. I just NEEDED to get out of there. We hurried up and got our items and checked out.
Once again I get into the drivers seat. We leave and are on the hwy home. That’s when it all happened. I felt my entire face go numb…I was thinking how odd, but I was still really grumpy so I pushed it aside. I went to set the cruise control which I’ve done a thousand times. I couldn’t figure out how to set it. I had no memory what to do. Liz asked me what was wrong and I told her I couldn’t remember how to set the cruise control. I don’t remember if I ever set it or not. So we get onto our gravel road and the outside window got some condensation on it. I for the life of me couldn’t figure out how to make it go away so I could see.
Liz, tells me to turn on the wipers and just like magic I can see again. By this time I’ve got blurry vision in my right eye. Yes, I’m still driving. I told Liz I wasn’t feeling the best and she asked me if I was having a stroke. I told her no very harshly even though by this time I was beginning to wonder.
Never once did it occur to me to pull over and have Liz take over driving.
We finally made it home and all in once place. I’m feeling confused and crabby. I knew something wasn’t right. I didn’t want to go to the ER for them to tell me it was all in my head and I couldn’t afford a ER bill as it was.
I told Liz to look up signs of stroke even though I knew the signs, I needed to see it with my eyes. As the time goes by and it was probably only a few minutes I’m feeling more and more confused and my entire face was completely numb.
Liz wasn’t get results fast enough for me so I googled the site WebMd. It’s a site I’ve used many times and recommended to lots of people but I couldn’t remember what it was called. Finally got to the site and put in my symptoms. I kept seeing Stroke, Stroke, Stroke, Stroke, I got that feeling in the pit in my stomach. I just knew I was having a stroke. Heck I’ve had training in what to do to help a stroke victim. But when your going through it, what you’ve learned goes out the window.
I told Liz that I thought we better go to the ER. So back to the van with girls in tow. By this time I was having problems walking. I remember Liz asking me if I needed help walking and I snapped at her and said no. Then boom, I couldn’t figure out how to take the next step. She had to walk me to the car. I’m terrified by this time. I know something is horribly wrong. I was trying to be brave and strong for the kids. I didn’t want them to see me this way.
I don’t remember the ride to the hospital. We get there and I was determined to walk in under my own accord. I know before we reached the desk the lady stood up and said “can I help you?”. I replied with I don’t feel so good. I don’t remember getting to the room. I don’t know if I told the girls to wait in the waiting room or Liz did. We get to the room and I’m crying. I have no idea why. I sit on the bed and they ask me my name. I could hear my name in my head but I couldn’t remember how to say it. I looked at Liz and she started giving them my info. After that I don’t remember anything until I came out of it.
The rest of what I will tell you will be what Liz has told me and the nurses in the ER.
Liz told me that when I looked at her I looked very overwhelmed. Thank the Goddess she knows my info.
Nurses told me my heart rate was 145 when I came in and my blood pressure was through the roof. I can’t remember who told me I got an EKG but I got one of them too.
They did a CT scan and a chest xray. So the stroke earned me a night in the hospital. I had bruises all over my right arm and no memory of how they got there. I had no memory of being hooked up to the heart monitor or the oxygen. I remember at one point and time I felt like I had a ton of people in my face. Liz said several were working on me. I can’t even type that without tearing up. How scared she must have been seeing me in that position.
I didn’t sleep at all while in the hospital so when the doc came in, I did my very best to act like I was normal. I wanted OUT! They ran some more blood work and did some sort of test on my next to see if anything was clogged. It was like an ultrasound but on my neck.
For the first week I was having major issues with confusion but each day I seemed to get a little bit better.
I had an ECHO done a week ago. Still no results from that.
My doctors theory is this….My heart was beating so fast it got tired and some how I got a clot, causing the mini stroke. He thinks I have bacteria on my heart valve which would explain the high white cell count I’ve had for the last year and my heart pumping so fast.
Unfortunately I’m not doing a whole lot better. I keep having the numbness on the left side. It does always goes away and doesn’t stay to terribly wrong.. I’m having balance issues and I keep losing track of what I am talking about and searching for words that are part of my normal vocabulary. I am so tired it’s unreal. I get worn out super fast. Just taking a shower wears me out and I have to sit down for a bit before I can even brush my teeth.
I’m going to be 40 on Monday and I’m way to young for this. It has me thinking about what if I do die, about my kids. I’m going to get a living will. I am also going to plan my own funeral. Is it a bit morbid, maybe. But I want to make things easier for my kids if I were to go. In spite of sounding morbid just now I am not dwelling on death and I AM thinking positive. Things will be ok and I will have a full recovery.
So, I’ve written a mini novel. If you’ve made it this far thank you for taking the time.
This took me over an hour to write. I had to keep going back and fixing things. Sighs…so if I’ve still left words out or didn’t make sense in some of them just ignore it. LOL
My blog here is just a back up blog. While I do upload most of my blogs to this site I have a blog on my own site www.prettyinpinkpixels.com/blog that is my main blog. :)
Well, it’s 6:45am and I haven’t been to bed yet. Between my insomnia and this silly storm I haven’t been able to go to bed yet.
About 5:30 this morning the rain was pelting the windows it was coming down so hard. We had wind gusts of 60mph. Thankfully we only lost a few tree limbs. Lots of others in the area faired out lots worse.
The storm was so fierce it woke up Sophie and Sarah. I sat on the couch with Sarah on my lap and Sophie next to me. Guess was sitting at my feet because she was scared. For some reason she didn’t want up on the couch.
As we were all sitting there watching the lights flicker on and off like a child playing with a light switch I smelled this horrible God awful smell. Checked Sarah, it wasn’t her. Was Sophie so scared she poo’d her pants?
She didn’t seem to be that scared but what else could it be? I asked Sophie if she had gone to the bathroom in her pants. She looked at me like she was really offended and replied with a haughty 'noooooooo. That’s when I realized where the smell was coming from. It wasn’t Sarah’s butt, it wasn’t me or Guess’s butt, wasn’t even Sophie’s butt. It was Sophie’s breath! O.M.G!!!! It smelled like someone had taken a poo in her mouth. It was so bad I was gagging. I had to have her go and brush her teeth and tongue in the middle of this storm. I didn’t think it was possible for anyone to have such foul smelling breath. Let alone a young girl at the tender age of 9. Lands alive it was something awful.
Now the girls are fast asleep. Sophie with her now minty fresh breath. The worst part of the storm is over. Just a wee bit of lightening and some light thunder are all that remain.
As the sun peeks it’s sleepy head out from behind the clouds I bid ya’ll a good night.
I was in the process of looking for something else when I came across “The Indian Ten Commandments”. Of course once I found it, what I was actually looking for was long forgotten.
I loved them so much I thought I would share.
Treat the Earth and all that dwell therein with respect
Remain close to the Great Spirit
Show great respect for your fellow beings
Work together for the benefit of all Mankind
Give assistance and kindness wherever needed
Do what you know to be right
Look after the well-being of Mind and Body
Dedicate a share of your efforts to the greater Good
Be truthful and honest at all times
Take full responsibility for your actions
Wow what a week and not in a good way. Tuesday my daughter took me to the ER where they said I had a mini stroke, and something is wrong with my heart.
Weds a young man that I had seen grow up into the fine man he is today passed away.
Friday, a dear friend of mine who runs an autobody shop and needs both hands to work crushed one of his hands.
That is so much to process in such a short time.
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