Release Me

I took the above pic a few weeks ago. Within this pic I see the past ending and no longer hanging on to it. I also see a slew of brand new possibilities where ever the road of life takes me.  Which is not surprising at all because that’s pretty much whats going on with me. I’m working on getting my life together. To become a better me, no longer letting people walk over me as if I were a rug. Some of these changes are hard and others are so natural it’s like breathing.

Today, I had a bit more pain then normal in my back and leg but in spite of that I had a nice day.  I went to the pain clinic then met my daughter and her friend for lunch. We went to Red Robin’s. I had never been there before but was glad we went as it was yummy and they had wonderful service.  Came home and played with Sarah for a bit before the girls got home from school.  Later we ordered pizza and watched a movie and ate our pizza in front of the tv. 

After all were in bed I started feeling a little down thinking about different things. Eliminating the toxic people from life was easy at first but it also left a hole where they used to be.  So when I get down I try to get my brain busy so I don’t have to think about it. Tonight though it wasn’t working. Then something wonderful happened.

I had been charging my daughter’s MP3 player. It was fully charged and I unplugged it and somehow I turned it on. While trying to figure out how to turn it off I saw what song was playing. It was “Release Me” I stared at it for about 15 seconds thinking this is telling me something and it hit me. I was receiving a message. By releasing the toxic people I am releasing the toxicity that was in me by associating with them.  Toxic people are draining and can really change a person’s moods. They try and drag a person into their world.  So while I have released them I am also releasing myself.

Now truth be told I AM still a little down but I know that this shall pass and I will be for the better of it.

By the way her MP3 player is still on. I gave up on turning it off. *shrugs*

What Color Crayon Are You?

You Are a Green Crayon

Your world is colored in harmonious, peaceful, natural colors. While some may associate green with money, you are one of the least materialistic people around. Comfort is important to you. You like to feel as relaxed as possible - and you try to make others feel at ease. You're very happy with who you are, and it certainly shows! Your color wheel opposite is red. Every time you feel grounded, a red person does their best to shake you.

What Color Crayon Are You?

The First Rule of Blogthings Is: You Don't Talk About Blogthings

Surprise Visit

We had an unexpected visit from the Easter Bunny today. Something caught Sophie’s eye this afternoon and she got this puzzled look on her face. She says “Mom, umm…there is someone outside in our yard dressed like the Easter Bunny putting eggs in our yard.” I just kinda looked at her and I said yeah ok Sophie. She does have a flare for the dramatic so I was thinking she was seeing a bunny rabbit.  She got up and she looked out the window and she said she was serious. Sarah is looking out the window by this time. I’m thinking, ok who slipped my daughter drugs. Seriously, Easter  Bunny in our yard? What in the world? I got up and joined the girls and sure enough the Easter Bunny was just finishing up and going across the road. 

The girls were so excited it’s unreal. Once they settled down a bit we got our coats on, I grabbed the camera and they went looking for eggs. Sophie requested that I not take her pic, she’s 9 now you know. But as all of you know I love to take pics so she got a few pics taken anyway. LOL…I got several good pics of Sarah and a few of Sophie.

I want to say a HUGE Thank you to my neighbors for dressing up and giving the girls such a wonderful and unexpected surprise. You really made their day and I know they will remember this for years to come.

Sarah getting one of the eggs the bunny hid.

She was so excited she was running back to show me what she had found.

Sophie getting ready to take a peek at whats in the egg. Notice she brought her bunny with her to go on the hunt.

She was pleasantly surprised at what was inside the egg. She told me she thought they would be empty and she got all excited when she saw the candy.

Maple

I found out last Monday that my landlord would be cutting down my maple tree. OK, so it’s not “MY” tree but I’ve always felt a kinship with it. I know some of you may scoff at that and that’s fine with me.  I cried when I found out it was going to be cut down. While I did feel a bit silly about crying over a tree, cry I did do.  Brian said “your not gonna tie yourself to the tree so they can’t cut it down are you?” I told him to not give me any ideas.  LOL

To me it’s more then a maple tree. It provided shade for us to sit under on a hot summer day.  Many times we’ve put the picnic table under the tree. Watching the girls play in their sandbox which was under the tree. It was a place for birds to build their nests and hatch their families.  Always provided a wonderful background for many pictures I’ve taken through the years.

So the day I found out I made sure to take a final pic of the girls in front of the tree.

I also took a pic of the tree it’s self. If you look close you can see little buds beginning. This tree is NOT dead and I just can’t understand why the whole thing had to be cut down.

I was able to enjoy my  tree for a few more days before they cut down. The day they came to cut it down, the girls where in school so Sarah and I left. I couldn’t bare the sound of the tree being cut down. I swear I could feel it’s pain.

When I came home this is what I came home to. It’s been almost a week and it’s still in a pile. I have no idea why they didn’t clean it up. I’ve been assured someone is coming out to clean it up, but alas it’s not happened yet. Seeing this day in and day out is like pouring salt on a wound.   If it doesn’t get cleaned up soon I’m gonna have to do it and I don’t think my back can handle picking up this huge mess let alone being able to even lift some of the bigger pieces.

I will be planting a new tree of my choice and if they don’t like it they can kiss my rear end. 

Sweet 13

On Saturday we had a 13th birthday party for Emma.  She had never really had a “real” party prior to this one. A few sleep overs and family get togethers but nothing with all her friends.

I thought since 13 is such a big occasion it was the perfect time to throw a party.  My house is way to small and we are so far out in the country I was afraid no one would come so we rented the building out at the city park.

Emma holding her cake prior to everyone getting there. The cake was made at HyVee. They always do such a wonderful job and whenever we get a cake made we always go there.

Saturday morning we woke up to snow and cold temps. Who would have thought that it would be so miserable out in the middle of April. Thank goodness the building had heat! Other wise we all would have froze our bottoms off.

Emma had invited about 24 people. We assumed half would show up, but planned for all 24 just in case.  I am so thankful that I did because all but 2 showed up. Then there was Justin, Shawna, Claire, Shawn, LIz, Chels, Sarah, Sophie, and myself to add to the mix.   In spite of so many being there it went very well. I think everyone had a good time.

We brought Sophie’s little boom box for music and borrowed Chels Wii and her tv for the kids to play. The Wii was a huge hit! It was so funny watching everyone play Just Dance 2 on there.

We were unsure if Emma’s bf Trace was going to be able to make it as he had been sick over the last few days. So when he walked in, her eyes lite up and she ran to him and gave him a big ole hug! He still wasn’t feeling the best, you could see it in his eyes but he still came. That was so sweet of him!

I have to say I think it was a success and everyone had fun. I enjoyed watching everyone and I loved the fact that after the first few minutes the boys and girls mingled and didn’t just stay on opposite sides of the room.

When it was over, and we had finished cleaning up I came home and took a 3 hour nap. LOL…..Wore me plum out.

Next big birthday in my family will be Justin. He’s turning the big 21. I am assuming whatever we do for him will more then likely be at a bar. LOL Goddess help me! Thankfully I have until July 31st and his GF can help me plan something.

I don’t have any freebies or samples for you today.  Hopefully tomorrow.

Blah Blah Blah

Guess what? I’m sick AGAIN! I know, a shocker right?! I woke up yesterday just feeling a bit off, a few hours later I was super tired so I took a nap. Had a crazy dream, which I got woken up from and I knew something was up. Took my temp and yep fever of 100.6. By the time I went to bed for the night it was 101 and my legs were feeling wobbly. I can not stress enough how tired I am of being sick. I told myself that I was gonna call the doc today and get in but I’m just so dang exhausted that as soon as the girls leave I’m going back to bed. 

I am going to assume it’s another UTI, I seem to be getting them every few weeks now. I was clear last week but had a bad one the week before.  Hopefully when I see the urologist in a few weeks we can get to the root of the problem and get all fixed up. 

 

On a different note. I loved today’s Note From the Universe. It said…………

“When you don't know what you want, Jamie, it's probably time to begin enjoying what you have.
You've done so well for yourself,
    The Universe”

Isn’t that so true? It can apply to so many things in my life. It doesn’t even have to be materialistic, it can be just things going on within.

I have one freebie for you today. If you sign up for a newsletter to this place you will receive a free mystery bag in the mail. Could be something as simple as stickers and a key chain or something as nice as a watch. So hop on over to the Oriental Watch Site and sign up for yours.

Workn’ for a Living

Justin has been working for a friend of mine doing a bit of construction. So yesterday Sarah and I stopped out at the job site. I got to see the work truck Justin bought for the first time. He’s so proud of it.

I also got to see him in action. He was climbing around in the rafters like one of those people you see way up in the air at the circus.

Working hard

Look at that balance!!! Reminds me of when he was a young boy and he would climb the tree out front of our apt building. He would be barefoot and just shimmy right up the tree. Ahhhh….. Memories

 

I would have been trembling with fear way up there but he was in his element doing his thing.

He had his little puppy with him. He is such a little thing. Not sure of the breed I’ll have to ask him.

You know it’s a true man’s job site when you can take your dog with you. Cooper seemed to be having a blast and Sarah enjoyed playing with him. He’s actually a pretty well behaved puppy.

As it was approaching time for the girls to get out of school I ran home and picked them up then we went back out to the job site where we met up with Shawna and we all had pizza. I think the girls had a nice time. Something different to do and they got to see Justin, Shawna, and Cooper. The girls are all over the moon about cooper.

So all in all we had a really nice day yesterday.

Park

Today was the first super beautiful day were we could break out the shorts, sunglasses, and flipflops.  Even though I’m still feeling pretty crappy I couldn’t make the girls sit inside all day.  We ran to Hale Tap for a quick and relaxing lunch.

After lunch we went to the park. Emma met up with some of her friends and Sophie and Sarah played their little hearts out. It was nice to see them running around and having a good time. I was surprised we were the only ones there though. You would think with such beautiful weather everyone would have been out at the park.

I think the sun was good for all of us. They sure wore me out anyway.

In the spirit of having such a wonderful day I have a link for ya’ll to sign up to try and win a free BBQ Grill.  They will be drawing at the end of the month so good luck!!!!

Update

I took the above pic last night. The sliver of moon set across the sky was just to gorgeous to not snap.

Went to see the Oncologist yesterday. Had been running a fever for a few days with no symptoms.  By the time I got there I was feeling pretty poorly and my Mom said I was pale. All I know is I was hot, thirsty, and felt like I was gonna pass out. 

They did some blood work and a urine on me. The urine came back with once again another bladder infection. I guess the white cell count was so high she was worried so she had me get an IV of a triple dose of a heavy duty anti-bitoic before I went home. I felt pretty weak afterwards for some reason but my Mom said I had a bit of color in my face and wasn’t as pale.

Good news I for sure don’t have any blood related cancer of any sort. So we are holding out for the fact that maybe something is wrong with me anatomically and maybe my bladder or whatever isn't where it should be anymore which is causing me to get repeated UTI’s.

My next step is to take this course of meds, and wait for the testing from the Urologist.  He will be doing an x-ray of my bladder and a scope to make sure there is no blockage or nothing looking odd to cause the repeated infections. 

Problem is even when I’m not having an active  bladder infection my count is still high, so when I do get an infection the count goes even higher.

We’ve done about all the blood work that can be done so if all is good with the xray and scope then the next step will probably be the CT scan which I mentioned in an earlier blog I don’t want to do.

For now I’m feeling pretty poorly and weak. Like a slug on a rug. So with that I’m gonna get to bed. I was gonna be asleep over an hour ago and I’m more then ready.

Cleaning Tips For Men

I ran across this the other day and I thought how helpful it would be to my readers who are Men. Here are some quick and easy ways to help clean around the house.  I hope you find it useful

Cleaning Tips For Men:

*

Dirt:

Layers of dirty film on windows and screens provide a helpful filter

against harmful and aging rays from the sun. Call it an SPF factor of 5

and leave it alone.

*

Cobwebs:

Cobwebs artfully draped over lampshades reduces the glare from the bulb,

thereby creating a romantic atmosphere. If your girlfriend points out

that the light fixtures need dusting, simply look confused and exclaim,

"What? And spoil the mood?"

*

Guests:

If unexpected company is coming, pile everything unsightly into one room

and close the door. As you show your guests through your tidy home,

rattle the door knob vigorously, fake a growl, and say, "I'd love you to

see our Den, but Fluffy hates to be disturbed and the rabies shots are

SO expensive."

*

Dusting:

If dusting is REALLY out of control, simply place a showy urn on the

coffee table and insist that "This is where Grandma wanted us to scatter

her ashes."

*

Painting:

Don't bother repainting. Simply scribble lightly over a dirty wall with

an assortment of crayons, and try to muster a glint of tears as you say,

"Junior did this the week before that unspeakable accident.I haven't had

the heart to clean it..."

*

General Cleaning:

Mix one-quart cup pine-scented household cleaner with four cup soft

water in a spray bottle. Mist the air lightly. Leave dampened rags in

conspicuous locations. Develop an exhausted look, throw yourself onto

the couch, and sigh, "I clean and I clean and I still don't get

anywhere."

Fever

Looks like I am back into the fever boat again. Been running at about 101F since Friday. My only signs are getting a chill when the fever starts, being tired and weak. I’ve had high white cell count for the last 6 months and the doctors have run test after test and can’t find whats going on.

I finally did a bit of research on my own and of course none of it is good. Though I now know why I have the above symptoms.  My white cells are to many and using up lots of energy which causes me to be hungry, tired, and run a fever. Normally when you have a high count it means there is some infection going on, can also mean you have cancer.

I haven’t done any CAT or PET scans yet. My doctor knows I have huge issues with radiation going into my body after being treated with it for cancer.  I have a sinking feeling she’s gonna say it’s time to run these so we can find whats going on because blood tests are not getting us anywhere.

I’m just torn, I want answers but the amount of radiation in those tests alone can cause cancer. No thank you, been there done that. On the flip side how much longer can I go on living this way? I never know from hour to hour how I’m going to feel.  I woke up this morning feeling okish and by late morning I was running a fever.  I’ve been going to bed at night around 8:30-9:00pm each night and sleeping through the night. For those of you that know me, know that I have huge insomnia issues and I never go to sleep that early. Even after a good nights sleep, once the fever starts I’m so tired and I just feel like slug moving around.

So anyway, I called my oncologist to report that I was getting my fevers again and she wants to see me weds. The only reason it’s not sooner is she’s out sick until weds.  I really hope we can get to the root of this then.

I also have a sample for you today…I know it’s been a while. If you would like to have a sample of  Shout Color Catcher then click the link and sign up.